Red Hot Guilt
by PhantomKnight88
Summary: Lisbon is haunted by the memory of a man she killed when her team is assigned a new consultant. Will he be the solution to all her problems or just make them worse?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This story is a result of some very vicious plot bunnies, who refused to rest until I started writing despite the fact that I'm working on another story. Because of that I can't promise how often I'll update but I WILL finish this story no matter how long it takes. If you're confused at first don't worry, you're supposed to be.**

**Disclaimer: Don't own them...shutters to think of the plot bunny attacks that would occur if I did.**

Red Hot Guilt

_She hurried down the dock, as fast as she could without making too much noise, the others only steps behind her. All had their guns drawn, pointing down and away. They were nearing the edge of the wharf when voices could be heard from just beyond the next group of shipping crates; she quickly crouched down behind the nearest one._

_Motioning for the others to remain hidden she slowly peered over the top of the crate. In the dim light of the nearest warehouse lamp she could see two men. The man nearest her was kneeling on the ground, his hands handcuffed behind his back. The other was standing in front of the kneeling man near the edge of the dock. _

_She couldn't see the second man's hands, but she knew he must have some kind of weapon. She moved slightly and as she did the light flickered off something metal in the second man's hands. She again motioned to the others and they spread out to either side of her. She gave them a few moments to get into position and as one they moved from concealment, gun's drawn._

_As she stood the second man's head turned toward her and she was able to see something in his eyes. Without warning there was a flash of light and the sound of a gun firing. Her own reaction was instantaneous._

_The second man jerked back as her bullet hit him. She stood frozen as he stumbled over the edge of the dock. The splash spurred her into action. She raced to the edge of the dock but all she could see was the blackness of the water stretching out before her._

Teresa Lisbon, senior agent of the California Bureau of Investigation Serious crimes unit, sat straight up in bed breathing heavily. She could feel a cold sweat covering her body causing her pajamas to cling to every inch of her and drenching her bed sheets.

A dream, it had just been a horrible nightmare. When she got into work in a few hours she would find everything the way it was supposed to be with everyone where they were supposed to be. At least that's what she tried to tell herself. Unfortunately, the moral's that made her a tough but fair by the book cop also prevented her from lying even to herself. Besides even if she could have tricked her mind, she could never fool her heart.

In her heart she knew the truth, and the truth was that she had killed a man she had once considered her friend. One of the few people she had trusted since her mother died. She had been told so many times that it wasn't her fault, that she had been doing her job, what she had been trained to do, but it was again a lie that she knew her heart would never believe.

In fact, people telling her that had only made the feelings worse. What was her job doing to her if it trained her to shoot to kill a friend regardless of what that friend had been doing? It was that thought that had plagued her night and day ever since that night.

A loud beeping interrupted her thoughts, bringing her back to the present. Not that the present was much better than her dreams. She reached over silencing her alarm clock before peeling back her soiled sheets. She would have to set aside a time to wash her dirty sheets again; of her ten sets only one was still clean and she would need that for that night.

Several minutes later Lisbon stood in her shower, eyes closed as the hot water rained down around her. She stood there, forcing her body to allow the steaming water to relax her tense muscles and not dwell on the dream. She stood there until the water turned luke-warm and eventually cold, but the uneasy guilt remained.

Stepping out of the shower and into the cold bathroom she quickly wrapped herself in a towel, wondering why it didn't work. Of all the things she had tried in the last year she had found only that ritual was able to calm her down enough to get her through the day.

She paused as that last thought registered and groaned loudly. She couldn't believe that she had actually forgotten it for any length of time; today was the day that marked the one year anniversary of that dreadful night. Of course she wouldn't be able to push aside her guilt today; today it would burn hotter than it fully registered exactly what she had done.

As she continued to get ready she was constantly cursing herself for her weakness. What was done was done and there was nothing to be accomplished by dwelling on it. But he had been her friend, her best friend even, and she had killed him. That wasn't something you just 'got' over.

Thoughts of her friend continued to roll around in her mind as she finished getting ready. Eventually she sighed and took one last look in the mirror. She was dressed in the outfit he had liked best, black pants and jacket with a light blue blouse and her standard gold cross necklace, her hair left hanging. She wanted to look her best for him even if he wasn't around to see it.

The day itself seemed to reflect her dark mood, the black storm clouds above her sending their fury down in sheets of water. Lightning could bee seen in the distance brining the promise of even worse weather to come.

The drive to CBI headquarters seemed to take forever, yet all too soon Lisbon was in the elevator going up to her floor. She could feel the tension as soon as the doors opened. At first she thought it was just tension created from her teams feelings of guilt and grief, but one look inside the unit and she knew that wasn't the case. They were too still, too straight as the sat at their desk. It wasn't hard to figure out why.

"What do you think you're doing?" The man laying on the worn, brown, leather sofa in the corner as if he owned the place must have been very brave or very stupid as he didn't cower in the face of Lisbon's anger.

Instead he sat up slowly and allowed a grin to stretch across his face. He looked up at her, his eyes dancing with mischief and his voice practically oozing with charm as he stuck his hand out. "Senior Agent Lisbon I presume. It's an honor to meet you, I'm…"

Before he could finish another voice rang out from the hallway, "Lisbon, I need to talk to you."

Giving the still smiling man one last glare, Lisbon turned around and walked over to where her boss was waiting for her.

She didn't bother to wait for Minelli to explain or to hide her annoyance. "Sir, who is that man and what is he doing in my unit?"

Minelli frowned at her. "I don't appreciate that tone Agent Lisbon, but considering the circumstances I'll ignore it today. That man is in your unit because I ordered him to be.

"He's your team's new consultant."


	2. Chapter 2

Lisbon couldn't believe what she was hearing. If it wasn't so ludicrous to think that Minelli had developed a sense of humor she'd have thought he was joking. The last thing her team needed was a consultant; today of all days.

"Sir," Lisbon concentrated on remaining calm, it wouldn't do any good to get mad at her boss, "With all due respect my team doesn't need a consultant. We solve cases just fine without help. Send him to Paulson."

"Lisbon, this is not a debate. Now, I know the last year has been terrible for both you and your team, but you're the best the CBI has to offer and this man is the best at what he does.

Lisbon would have continued to argue but knew that it wouldn't do any good. Still, she couldn't help but ask, "But did it have to be today?" She almost winced at the whinny tone of her voice; she sounded like a child.

"Teresa," Lisbon was thrown off guard by the use of her first name; Minelli never used her first name, "I specifically asked him if he could start today. The hell your team has been through has been showing in your work. I'm hoping that by starting anew on the day that everything fell apart will help all of you to move on."

Lisbon still wasn't happy about it, but knew there was nothing more to say. She breathed deeply for a moment then squared her shoulders and looked her boss in the eyes. "Let's meet this consultant you've hired." The words rang with a finality she hadn't expected and she couldn't help but feel like a traitor.

Minelli nodded at her, pleased and not a little bit relieved that she hadn't put up more of a fight, and motioned for the man in question to join them.

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Lisbon had barely passed the threshold of the unit when she was bombarded with questions from her team.

"Who is that guy?"

"What is he doing here?"

"He say's he going to be on the team but he's not right?"

The rest of the team hadn't heard that and they turned to Lisbon in confusion. They all were silently pleading with their eyes to tell them that that wasn't the case.

Lisbon wished that she could but she had been given an order and she would carry it out. She raised her hands to stem the questions she could see on the team's faces. "Look I don't like this anymore than you do, but Minelli seems to think that we need a consultant. This guy is who he picked."

Apparently neither her I'm-not-going-to-argue tone nor commanding gesture was enough to stop the outrage.

"You're not serious?"

"Minelli's got to be joking?"

"Why? We've been solving cases just fine on our own."

Lisbon sighed heavily. "I know and I tried to get him assigned somewhere else but Minelli wouldn't hear of it. So as orders are orders we're just going to have to deal with it whether we like it or not."

They still didn't look happy, but she hadn't expected them to be. The newest member of the team couldn't help but ask the question on all of their minds, "But why did it have to be today?"

Lisbon just stood there for several moments, her eyes clouded with pain, debating her answer.

"We've got work to do, get to it." With that she turned on her heels and walked into her office, leaving the bewildered agents behind her.

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Lisbon walked down the dock with the rest of her team, the memories of the day a year before bombarding her and the day she'd just had hadn't helped any thing. The day had been even harder than she had expected and she had expected quite a lot. On most days she had tried to pretend that he hadn't ever existed and pushed thoughts of him into the farthest corners of her mind, but it just hadn't been possible. One look at the haggard appearance of her team told her they had had similar days.

And the new consultant hadn't helped the situation, the arrogant little toe rag, despite what Minelli had desired. If anything it had made things worse. He had been completely oblivious to, or just ignoring, the obvious pain the team had been in. He'd merely flitted about with a cheery smile and oozing charm as he tried to delve into the teams secrets. He hadn't even seemed bothered when Lisbon had told him to sit down and shut up.

Needless to say it had been a relief when the work day had ended, but it had been only momentary; the hardest part had yet to come.

The drive from Sacramento to San Francisco had been both the longest and quietest ride of any of their lives. They had been too caught up in their own memories to speak even three words to each other and music would have been merely irritating.

Lisbon snapped out of her thoughts when she registered that the other's had stopped; she looked around in confusion before recognizing where they were. Apparently the trip down the dock was shorter than she remembered.

They stood there silently for several moments as they remembered the events from that night, allowing the grief that they had hidden since just after it had first happened to come fully to the surface. It seemed their recollection of that night ended at the same time because as one, and without prompting, they reached into the cooler they had brought and each took out a bottle. They stood in a circle staring at their feet, studiously avoiding the other's eyes, no one wanting to go first. Finally, one braved the plunge.

"He was the best detective anyone could have ever hoped for, no matter how unconventional his methods were." The normally stoic Kimball Cho couldn't keep the grief from his voice as he raised his bottle in front of him.

"He always made things interesting even if his scarily accurate insights made you want to punch him sometimes." Wayne Rigsby raised his bottle to Cho's not even bothering to try and hide his grief.

"He always claimed he didn't believe in God, but I hope he has found comfort with the Almighty." Tears streamed down Grace Van Pelt's face, as they had been off and on all day, as she too raised her bottle.

The others had already said everything she had thought of saying, so fighting to keep her voice steady and the tears from falling Lisbon raised her own bottle completing the circle.

"Rest in peace, Patrick Jane."

***Jumps behind the nearest stack of crates and raises the white flag of surrender* No one shoot me please (or send me any nasty reviews). I will explain all, you just need to have patience and give me some time. To those of you who realized it was Jane Lisbon shot, good job. I thought I had done a pretty good job hiding that fact but not so well as to confuse everyone.**

**On a side note I was wondering if anyone would be willing to beta for me. I have someone who's willing to read it for content but she says that she's not too great with spelling and grammar. If you're willing to help me just PM me and I'll get to you. **


	3. Chapter 3

**So no one gets confused, basically what I'm doing is telling the story in two parts. The unitalizised chapters are going to deal with the team's reaction to Jane's death while the italizised chapters tell the story of how his death came about. **

_Lisbon was frustrated, very very frustrated, bordering on angry frustrated; even after all the crap she'd already had to deal with today there was still more. Curse Jane, curse him to the fiery pits of hell where he belonged; this was all his fault. Well, maybe not his _entire_ fault, she had been putting this particular thing off for a while, but it was still his fault she was sitting here. Not to mention the growing headache that she'd long ago learned to attribute to him_

_Feeling the headache starting to pound again, she stabbed downward with the object in her hand taking out her frustration on the unsuspecting victim before her._

_"Whoa, what'd the ice cream do to you?" The spoon was halfway to Lisbon's mouth, full of chocolaty ice cream goodness, when the tone registered. That tone, there was only one person she knew who could pull off that tone; she shouldn't be surprised that he would follow her._

_Slowly, she put the spoon back into the paper cup all the while fixing her face into her best "I'm annoyed Jane, don't mess with me" glare and shot it at the offending party. It took a second to recognize her mistake; apparently there _were _two people capable of that particular tone._

_The man in front of her was not Patrick Jane; instead of Jane's curly blond hair he had light brown, instead of Jane's bright blue eyes he had brownish green. He was actually really cute, but he was no Patrick Jane… Lisbon mentally hit herself in the head; there she went again. She was starting to get really mad at her subconscious for comparing every man she met to Jane. But she had to admit there was something familiar about this man._

_"Um…sorry, I'll just go then." The man looked a little frightened and started to slowly back away._

_Lisbon, realizing that in her haze had left the glare on her face, instantly let her face soften and allow the chagrin to show. "I'm sorry. For a moment I thought you were someone else."_

_"Not too fond of them I take it." He made it a statement._

_"No, no. He's actually my best friend. But it's his birthday tomorrow and I have no clue what to get him." And Jane had decided to pull another one of his infamous stunts earlier that day once again almost succeeding in getting himself killed. She'd had over five hours of paperwork to do; sometimes she really wanted to shoot him herself._

_Seeing that he still didn't really get why she was so mad Lisbon explained further; she did feel bad for giving him her Jane glare, but she was glad to see that it at least worked on someone since it never seemed to work on its intended target. "It doesn't help that he decided to annoy me today…all day long." The last part came out as a growl._

_"Ah, boyfriend troubles." _

_Lisbon's head jerked up. "Boyfriend?" The thought made her pause for a moment before bursting into uncontrollable laughter; it was several moments before she could compose herself. "No, no, no, he's just a friend; a good friend, but still just a friend." So why did the thought of them being together fill her with longing?_

_"Gay or married?"_

_The question made Lisbon pause before starting to laugh again. Well, the gay part did; there was nothing funny about Jane being married. "What? Why would you ask that?"_

_He gave her a funny look, as if he couldn't believe she would ask that. "You're a young beautiful woman and as you don't have a wedding ring, he has to be either gay or married as to not notice you."_

_On the surface it seemed like he was just explaining his statement, but there was an undercurrent that made Lisbon think he was flirting with her. "He's neither gay nor married. I don't know where you got your opinion on the sexes but men and women can just be friends." Not that it applied to her and Jane; if he wasn't still hung up on murdering Red John she might even consider it. Might being the key word there._

_"If you say so." He turned and took a few steps as if he was going to leave before spinning back around. "Hey, I just had a thought. You said you couldn't think of a gift for your 'friend' and I'm actually here because my brother in law's birthday is tomorrow and I need to get him a present, so I was thinking how about we help each other out?"_

_Yep, he was defiantly flirting. Her initial reaction was to make a blanket statement that would send him away, but it had been so long since she'd even gone on a date, even longer since she'd had a second date with the same guy, that the thought was too tempting to pass up. _

_"Sure, why not, I could use the help." She'd long forgotten about her ice cream and she absent mindedly got up and threw it away. Not that she would admit it to anyone, but she was not subconsciously thinking about Jane's reaction when he found out she'd gone on a date. _

_She was just about to leave the mall food court when the man stopped her. "I think we forgot a step." He stuck his hand out to her. "Name's Logan Pierce."_

_Lisbon could feel a slight lift to her lips. "Teresa Lisbon, nice to meet you." The name seemed to click with familiarity of his appearance, but she still couldn't place him. "I'm sorry, but have we met before? I feel like I've seen you somewhere before?"_

_"I don't think so, I'm pretty sure I'd remember meeting you." He smiled softly at her._

_"Must just be my imagination then." She smiled back before leading him out of the food court._

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_A couple hours later Lisbon found herself walking out of the mall alone. She had had fun with Logan, he had a great sense of humor and they had been able to talk about a wide variety of things, but there was just something that wouldn't let her really click with him._

_And now that she wasn't frustrated beyond belief with Jane she was willing to admit, if only to herself, what that was. The truth was she was attracted to Jane, really really attracted. He might be an egotistical, meddling for his own amusement jerk, there was just something about him she found irresistible._

_Lisbon smacked her own forehead. She really had to get over this; they had been friends and coworkers for years now, far too long to risk loosing that over some silly little crush. And as long as he continued his quest for vengeance there was a good chance she would end up arresting him. Besides, even ten years after his wife's death he was still in love with her; there wasn't anyway he was attracted to her. _

_So wrapped up in her thoughts she almost passed right by the perfect gift, but fortunately stopped just in time. She and Logan had been able to find a good gift for his brother in law, but nothing Lisbon had seen said, "Jane," to her and so she had thought that she might have had to settle on taking him out to dinner._

_But this, this was perfect. It was a book about a man who was a police consulate by day and a superhero by night using his mental powers to stop the bad guys in both his occupations. But the best part was that it came with the superhero's costume. She briefly remembered her promise, what had it been four, five years ago, to make him a superhero costume. Well she wouldn't be making it, but there were a few things she had at home to make it even more Jane-like. _

_Lisbon smiled at the truly happy look that would cross Jane's face when he saw it and quickly went inside before the store closed. Tomorrow would be a great day._

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_Logan Pierce could feel both his tension and the tension of his parents as they waited to get through the building security. They hadn't seen his brother in law for years, not since _it_ happened, and that last meeting hadn't gone so well. _

_"Logan, tell us about this woman you met last night. Could she be someone you can start something with?" Logan smiled gently; leave it to his mom to attempt to lessen tension. And yet he knew that she was also bouncing up and down in excitement, metaphorically speaking, at the thought of him being involved with a woman again._

_After the even that must never be named, he'd gone through a really rough patch, starting drinking heavily and all that. At first his wife had tried to deal with it, she had hoped it wouldn't last very long, but as the years past he went from being an alcoholic to experimenting with drugs. That had been the final straw; she divorced him gaining sole custody of their young son in the process. _

_Her leaving had pushed him even farther into depression to the point where he had attempted to kill himself. Surprisingly, that had been what had saved him. The rehab facility he'd been admitted to was one of the best and they had helped him start to pull it together again. _

_He'd been sober now for over three years now. A year ago his ex wife even started letting him see their son again; the two of them had even been out by themselves a few times as she hadn't remarried or even have a new boyfriend. Not that his mom needed to know that, she was still angry about her divorcing him to begin with. No, it was better to see what might happen between them before letting his parents know about it. Last night with Teresa had been fun and he could imagine them being good friends; he had agreed with her when she'd said men and women could just be friends, he had just gotten the sense that her 'friend' meant more to her than she was willing to say. A feeling that had just gotten stronger as the night wore on._

_That had been the real reason for him asking her help, he had wanted to see if he was right; he was like his brother in law in that regard. But he also had wanted her help with the gift and she had helped him find the perfect one. Teresa really was an amazing woman, too bad he would never see her again._

_"I had a fun time with her. But I don't think that she's someone I could start a relationship with. I got the sense that she's hung up on a guy she knows." He smirked slightly as his mother's face fell._

_"You didn't even give her a chance did you?" Her voice was dripping with disapproval. "Why didn't you give her your number?"_

_Logan's dad had been quiet through the exchange so far but he felt it had gone far enough. "Give it a rest, Sarah. Logan doesn't need you meddling in his love life."_

_"It's alright, Dad. As a matter of fact I did give her my number. I just doubt that she'll call me." _

_Before his mother could inquire further it was their turn to go through security and once they were through made sure to find another topic to talk about in the elevator._

_"Do you think he'll even talk to us?" The worry in his tone was completely sincere; it was the question on all of their minds._

_His father just shook his head. "I don't know son, it's been a long time and from everything we've heard he's still worse off then you were."_

_The doors opened and the three slowly stepped out onto the floor. They stepped hesitantly down the hall unsure of what they could do. They had just made it a few steps when a young red haired woman approached them._

_"Hello, I'm Agent Van Pelt. Can I help you?" _

_Logan was caught of guard for a moment; she looked a little like his ex wife. "Yes, we're looking for Patrick Jane. We heard he works here."_

_He saw a flash of confusion in here eyes before she masked it. "I'm not sure where he is right now, but he can't have gone too far." A look of annoyance marred her face for a moment. "Scratch that he could, but I don't think he did. If you don't mind me asking what do you need to see him for?"_

_"It's his birthday today and we haven't seen him for a few years. See, he's my brother in law."_

_Surprise and understanding were openly visible on her face. "You're Jane's family? Hold on let me see if I can find him."_

_She turned to leave, but before she could two men came out of what Logan could only assume was the kitchen; the large one had a sandwich in his hand, while the Asian had a mug of coffee. _

_"Rigsby, Cho, have you guys seen Jane?"_

_The large one got an amused look on his face as he answered. "Yeah, he's in Lisbon's office. Been in there for over an hour. Doesn't take a genius to know what they're doing in there."_

_Logan frowned slightly. Lisbon? Naw, it couldn't be, could it?_

_"Will you shut up, Rigsby." So the big one was Rigsby. She turned to Logan and his family who looked slightly stunned. Rigsby couldn't be implying what they all thought he was. "Lisbon's probably just reaming him out for his stunt yesterday." Well, at least that explained the annoyance. _

_The Asian, Cho, got a slightly less stoic look, but only slightly. "She reamed him out yesterday and I've never seen her do that two days in a row. But at the same time I doubt Lisbon would be making out with Jane."_

_"Thank you Cho. Jane and Lisbon aren't doing anything together."_

_He went on as if Van Pelt hadn't spoken. "She wouldn't break CBI rules like that; they'll wait till their alone tonight, where they can do more than just kiss." The big one started laughing and Cho smirked._

_Van Pelt alternated with glaring at the two agents and shooting frantic glances at the Pierce's before settling on a faux calm. "Rigsby, Cho, I'd like to introduce you to Jane's in laws."_

_Both men froze, their faces falling; Rigsby even looked slightly terrified. But before anyone could say anything the office door behind them banged open revealing the two people in question._

_Logan couldn't believe it; it was her, imagine that. Talk about your coincidences. "Teresa what a lovely surprise. I must admit I didn't think to see you again so soon."_

_Before she could say anything Jane rounded on her. "I thought you said it must be another Logan Pierce, yet here he is, my brother in law saying how nice it is to see you again."_

_The angry look from the other night was back. "And how in blazes was I supposed to know that he was your brother in law?"_

_"I told you about him, I even showed you a picture."_

_"Once, Jane, once over two years ago; did you honestly expect me to remember especially considering we were both half drunk at the time?"_

_That one actually stumped him for a second. "You're a cop you're supposed to remember things like that."_

_"Really Jane, that's lame."_

_Apparently he seemed to agree because the anger faded from his face, or he just managed to mask it; with Patrick Jane one never knew. Though internally Logan was grinning he didn't allow a hint of it to show on his face and he didn't need to glance at his parents to know they were thinking the same thing. There was only one explanation for his anger; jealousy. They had seen a similar reaction once a long time ago when one of Sierra's former beaus can returned while they were dating._

_Jane was head over heals for Teresa Lisbon and everyone could see it but him…and maybe Lisbon herself._

_He turned and calmly walked towards where they were standing. "Sarah, Arthur, Logan. What are you doing here?"_

_Wisely, Logan and Arthur stood back and let Sarah do the talking; she had always gotten along with Jane best; though it might have had something to do with the fact that her daughter had been the spiting image of her. "Patrick, it's been ten years. We've missed you and still think of you as part of our family. We were hoping that you might be willing to go out to lunch with us. For your birthday."_

_Jane's face didn't loose his calm expression, but Logan knew he was considering it. After a moment he opened his mouth to speak and instinctively Logan knew he was going to tell them to get lost. Lisbon seemed to know it too because before he could speak she reached out and placed her hand on his upper arm._

_"Jane." That was it one word spoken softly, but everyone could see that it had changed everything._

_Jane locked eyes with Lisbon while he reached up and placed his hand over Lisbon's sighing heavily. "Alright, let's go to lunch."_

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_Later that night Lisbon sat on her couch wondering what in the world Jane and his in laws had talked about during their lunch. Jane hadn't said a word about it when he'd come back or during their team dinner. And the curiosity was like a raging inferno. _

_The good news was that he had definitely enjoyed his present form her. He didn't often show his real emotions and while most people couldn't tell the fake ones form the real ones, she could and she had seen real joy in his eyes; he'd insisted on going to the bathroom and putting on the outfit immediately. What really made her feel good was that while he enjoyed the other presents he'd gotten from the team, it was clear hers was his favorite._

_But all of that didn't distract from her desire to know what had happened between Jane and his in laws. And knowing Jane she could flat out ask him and all he'd do was smirk and walk off._

_So softly, Lisbon wasn't sure she'd even heard it, there was a knock at the door. Confused she walked to the door and looked through the peep hole. Her confusion deepened as she saw Jane standing there. Pulling open the door she stepped aside to let Jane past her into the apartment before going to back to sit on her couch._

_She watched as Jane silently paced back and forth, obviously debating something and if she wasn't hallucinating, nervous. She watched him for so long that she thought she was going to burst from curiosity. Just as she thought she couldn't stand it anymore he sat down next to her, closer than he had before; which was hard considering they'd been ignoring the little things like personal space for years._

_"Lisbon…I'm not…I'm not sure how to say this, so…so I'm not going to." Then without warning he bent his head and softly pressed his lips to hers. Caught off guard Lisbon remained still as the desires to either pull him closer or push him away warred within her. But before she could decide on either one he pulled back just far enough to stare into her eyes._

_"I just wanted you to know, I'm in love with you, and have been for a long time. I've resisted letting you know because I'm still committed to killing Red John and since you've promised to stop me, I didn't want to put you in an awkward position. But as my mother in law pointed out to me today it's not fair to not give you a choice in the matter." His already soft voice dropped so quiet Lisbon had to strain to hear even though she was right next to him. "So I'm asking you do you want to explore what we have despite what may happen or would you rather forget I've asked you?"_

_Lisbon sat stunned, she'd never fathomed Jane felt this way or that he even could feel this way; about her anyway. Just as the desires to either pull him closer or push him away as he'd kissed her, so did the desires to tell him yes or to tell him no. On the one hand she knew she loved him, had known it for a long time, but on the other hand how could she be with him when he had sworn to kill someone. _

_Then another thought struck her. She'd been trying to tell him that he wouldn't solve any problems by killing Red John for years without any success, but maybe the way to getting him to see differently was by _showing_ him what he would be giving up for revenge. To show him that his wife wouldn't have wanted him to throw away the shadow of a life he'd managed to build despite his hardest attempts to avoid it; she knew it without a doubt from just the little Jane had told her about his wife._

_She realized then that her decision had already been made, that she'd subconsciously made it years ago. She answered him in the same way he'd showed her his feelings; she brought her face up to his and kissed him just as softly as he'd kissed her, but instead of holding still he didn't hesitate to kiss her back._

_When oxygen became an issue she pulled back; they were both breathing heavily. "So was that a yes or an I'm just going to let you down easily." He smiled at her and she could tell he knew exactly what she had meant._

_So she kissed him again. Jane pushed her back into the couch, half on top of her as their lips continued to mold themselves to each other, their kissed becoming firmer as time passed. To Lisbon this was heaven, she had never allowed herself to imagine the possibility of kissing Jane; it just hadn't seemed possible._

_Time passed, how much time she couldn't be sure, but far too soon Jane was pulling back. "You're cell phone's ringing." His voice was ragged, laced with passion._

_She nodded unable to speak, but slowly got out from under him and answered. "Lisbon." She hoped whoever it was couldn't hear the raggedness in her own voice._

_She listened silently for a moment, before woodenly hanging up. This couldn't be happening, not now, it was too soon._

_"Teresa." She felt a tingle as he said her name, it was the first time she could remember him doing that. "What's wrong?"_

_"We've got a case." She turned to him, pressing her lips to his again briefly in one last kiss. "They think it was Red John."_

**I hope you guy's liked it, it took me forever how to decide how to start this chapter. And I've never written a romance scene before so hopefully it doesn't seem too corny. Let me know what you think.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Nope, don't own them. Just having a little fun.**

James Cory slammed the folders onto the desk with all the strength he could muster before throwing himself into his chair, openly glaring at the people sitting at their desks in front of him. He couldn't believe the audacity of these people. Every time he made some sort of observation, whether it was about one of his so-called teammates or the criminal they were after, they looked at him blankly before continuing as if he hadn't said a word.

And yet when they thought he wasn't around, and often when they knew he was, they speculated on what Patrick Jane would say about the case and what he would do to resolve it. Cory gritted his teeth. In the two months he had worked at CBI it seemed like all he had heard was Patrick Jane this or Patrick Jane that; Patrick Jane would have done this or Patrick Jane would have done that. Often these statements would be followed by a brief laugh before a look of sadness crossed their faces. It was sickening.

Now, he had no problem about them mourning their friend and colleague, but for heaven sakes the man had been dead for over a year! It was time for them to move on, to let someone else work with them. And there was no one better suited for that job than he, James Cory, was. He was the best in his field and in more ways than one better suited for detective work than Patrick Jane.

In college he had majored in criminal psychology, at Harvard no less, and had eventually earned his PhD in the field. His thesis had been on the mental process of serial killers. Then as a fully trained psychologist he had spent fifteen years in various prisons spanning from low to high security finding out just what made criminals tick. No one could deny that his resume was impressive, and yet here were these cops comparing him to some hack of an ex-psychic and finding the fraud better than him.

In the last two months the unit had had six cases and he had solved all but one. In his anger, Cory conveniently forgot that the unit hadn't had a single unsolved case the whole time Jane had been with them. The one he hadn't solved was fortunately not a cold case; the team would have loved that, it would have been the perfect excuse to get him fired. No, Agent Lisbon had somehow managed to put all the pieces together in the end.

And that brought him to another of his frustrations, if Cory had thought the three junior agents in the unit were bad in how they treated him, it was nothing compared to how their boss did.

On his very first day, when Agent Lisbon had come back from being told by Minelli that he would be taking over the consultant position, looking like she'd swallowed a gallon of sea water, she had angrily ordered him off the comfortable, worn, brown couch he had found to lay on while waiting to be introduced to his new co-workers.

As she hadn't offered an explanation for her order he had assumed that they just weren't supposed to use the couch when there was work to be done, but when he had sat there during his lunch break she had again ordered him off the couch. Only this time she had looked twice as angry and had Rigsby and Cho standing behind her looking intimidating.

Again he had just thought that they were annoyed, or maybe pissed was a better word. He knew he had started on the anniversary of their friend's death but had passed it off thinking he would show them how good he was when he came back in the morning. That he deserved to be there no matter what day he had started. But the next day, he'd come back to find that the couch wasn't in its spot and no one would say what had happened to it.

Cho and Rigsby had even had the nerve to tell him it must have grown legs and walked away. It was only after he'd seen it in Lisbon's office behind her desk he knew that there must have been something more to the couch that a place to sit. He'd complained about it only for Lisbon to tell him that as head of the unit the couch was technically hers and she could do what she wanted with it. It was only when he'd continued to pressure her that she'd told him that in no uncertain terms was anyone to sit there; the couch was Jane's.

Cory ground his teeth and turned his glare towards Lisbon's office. The woman was insufferable, unbending, and willful. How she, of all people, became the senior agent of such an important unit was beyond him. If her treatment of him continued he just might have to talk to Minelli about her.

He paused as he caught up to his own thoughts. Why wait, this behavior had been going on for two months without getting any better. If anything it had gotten worse.

He couldn't work like this; he _wouldn't_ work like this. Making up his mind Cory strode from the unit, his determination solidified when the team didn't even glance at him.

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"Where do you think he's going?" Rigsby asked his fellow agents without any real interest.

"Who cares?" Cho didn't even bother looking up from his novel.

"He looks mad."

Cho snorted. "He's been mad ever since we moved the couch. I think that was when he realized we really don't want him here."

"Arrogant little toe rag; thinks he's so much better than the rest of us." While at first the team hadn't like James Cory because they saw him as Jane's replacement, and it was still part of their dislike, but his arrogance and tendency to look down on all of them hadn't helped the situation.

"I'm not so sure that was a good idea." Rigsby and Cho turned to look at Van Pelt with confused looks on their faces; they had no clue what she was talking about. The comment seemed to have come out of no-where "I mean I don't think that moving the couch was such a good idea."

Cho's look of confusion transformed into one of understanding; he and Van Pelt had discussed this more than once.

"What you mean? You wanted to let Cory use Jane's couch?" Of course that understanding didn't apply to Rigsby.

"What? NO! Of course not, I wanted to shoot him when I came in and found him lying on the couch. And I wanted to do it again when he laid on it again after Lisbon had told him not to. I meant moving it into Lisbon's office."

"Oh ok." Rigsby was just about to go back to his unfinished report when he pulled up short. "Why?"

Cho and Van Pelt both rolled their eyes, there was no way that even Rigsby could be so dense. Especially, considering many of their conversations about this had been right in front of him.

"Maybe because Lisbon's been taking Jane's death hard." Cho was already close to loosing his patience.

Rigsby's look of confusion deepened. "We're all taking his death hard; he was our friend too."

"Yes, but we weren't the ones to shoot him." Van Pelt felt like she was explaining this to a child. "And Lisbon was closer to Jane than the rest of us. I wouldn't be surprised if they hadn't finally admitted they were in love with each other."

Rigsby still didn't get it. "I understand all that, but that still doesn't explain why Jane's couch shouldn't be in her office."

"Dude, haven't you noticed that Lisbon's been looking even more frayed around the edges since we moved it in her office?" Cho's patience had completely evaporated.

"I guess so." Rigsby spoke slowly.

"The couch is a constant reminder to Lisbon not only of Jane's death and the blame she carries for that but also what she knows she could have had with him."

But before Rigsby could respond to either Cho's or Van Pelt's comment the topic of their conversation strolled into the room. Now that Rigsby knew what to look for he could definitely see what the other two were talking about. Lisbon had deep circles under here eyes, her hair hung limp, and there was even less color in her pale skin then there had been before. For the first time since Rigsby had met her, she look frail, weak even.

"Gear up guys, we've got a case."

The three quickly rose and gathered their things.

"What do we have boss?" Rigsby might get confused by the finer aspects of Lisbon's nightmares, but he did know how to do his job.

"The wife and young child of a state lawyer were found murdered in their home."

"Should we wait for Cory?" Not that Van Pelt really cared.

"If he's not here when we get the call, he can find his own way. Unless one of you wants to leave him a note."

Cho, Rigsby, and Van Pelt shared a look before looking back at their boss. It was Cho who said what was on all their minds "If Cory's half as good as he thinks he is he should be able to figure it out on his own."

Lisbon wasn't inclined to disagree as she led them from the unit.

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Cory strode back into the room with a smirk on his face. His talk with Minelli had been very advantageous; he couldn't believe he hadn't thought of it before. Now Lisbon would have to show him the respect he deserved.

The smirk fell as the image in front of him registered. The room was completely empty and all their stuff was gone. As it was the middle of the day, there were only two options; they'd either gone out to lunch or had been called about a case without telling him, but he knew which one he'd bet on.

For the second time in less than half an hour he stormed from the unit and up to Minelli's office. These people would regret messing with him.


End file.
